lasting inhibited

I've been working solidly this week all week at the dance project, although I did forgo seeing St. Vincent tonight basically because I was freaked about having to go out in public a little bit. Really the thing was trying to get tickets from willcall at the Middle East. I wasn't sure how that process works at that spot, and I was freaked to have to try and ask around like a foolio. So I skipped it, which is lamoid spazzo, but such is life. Still I'm pretty beat down, and the show doesn't even start for another hour. Plus Saturday shows all go right up to or past when the T stops running, and the idea of actually driving someplace is a non-starter.
As to the dance project, I've been reading two books: Conditioning for Dance and Diet for Dancers. I figured the best place to start is with the basics. I've got some other stuff about movement and choreography, but I'm gonna hold off on that stuff and just try to build a solid routine of conditioning, health, and whatnot. The idea being to build dance into the very fabric of my life, as opposed to the special occasion-type deal that the live thing is. It's been good. I am willing to spend 45 minutes to an hour at it, and I've done so everyday this week without feeling taxed or stressed. Mostly I enjoy it and look forward to it, although I'm building some stretching and strength training stuff into the program so it's getting more serious. I'm trying to build slowly to a kind of eccentric professionalism and just generally get the move solid. In my past, I have trouble sticking to an exercise program on a long term duration, so that's really one of the main things; to keep at it.
Today's session was split between Rilo Kiley's Under the Blacklight and Shuggie Otis's Here Comes Shuggie Otis. I was having a bit of trouble really staying in the moment, and I was feeling a little cliched in my movement. Ultimately, it was a lacklluster day, but that's not out of keeping with how I was feeling. It can always be totally transformative, but that's the intended idea, to help to revitalize and spiritualize the self just a touch. So in that spirit, I do want to start and end dancetime with a meditational period to really help to get into the now. It is my honest intention not to overload myself here at the start of this process because that's how it always gets destroyed with too much added pressure of piled on responsibilities. So, take it slow, young one.
As an addendum, I will get back to the live concert review process, but clearly this blog has grown into both a reviewal forum and a discussion of the forward progression of the dance project. Let there be light, and there was light.